Comments on: READY OR NOT?

By: Ngozi

Ngozi — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 09:47:16 +0000

Kai!!!! Where have u been…these are things that have been on my mind…..things i know deep down and am trying to apply to my marriage…omo..there can never be 2 captains in one ship!!…But the society we live in makes us feel like fools if we submit to our husbands……its not a competition!!! the man is always the head no matter wat!!

By: Ireti

Ireti — Wed, 19 Aug 2009 11:09:05 +0000

Nice post!
We may not be able to affect the things that happen to us but we can affect our responses to such matters. Attitude is important!
Though not married yet, getting good dose of advice from somebody worthy

By: tholu

tholu — Tue, 23 Jun 2009 16:01:08 +0000

hey, were you at DAYSTAR ON THE 14TH OF JUNE . YOUR MESSAGE AND THAT OF REV. SAME IS THE SAME..-’MARRIAGE IS A COVENANT’.
THANKS FOR THIS SEASONED MESSAGE.

GOD BLESS

By: anuoluwapo

anuoluwapo — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 19:23:14 +0000

the earlier we all REALISE and ACCEPT that marriage is an institution founded by GOD HIMSELF WITHOUT ANYONE’S CONSULTATION, the better!

It’s not sentiment attched, when you are ready, tell him and see him work it out!!!

By: Tade

Tade — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 14:09:43 +0000

Hi Tope! You’ve raised a lot of pertinent issues and I dare say a network of young married couples where people are not afraid to be honest so as to help others. Getting married for me was wonderful but i quickly learnt that I could go NOWHERE to find help with regards to issues I was facing at home.
I was brought up to believe that issues are best resolved between your husband and yourself and God. but I believe there are many issues young married people need to hear from other young couples who are either going through this or have successfully gone through it.
For instance, its difficult when the woman is the breadwinner of the home earning much more and basically carrying the burden of the home and for the man to belive that since his wife earns the bulk he does little or nothing. I cringe when I realise month after month hubby doesnt ask about expenses but is comfortable living in a home funded by his wife (even after speaking to him about it)…. there’s a whole lot involved but it takes the grace of God and a commitment to the marriage vows not to throw it to the winds…
My point exactly is that a forum or meeting like you’ve suggested might help. I found your post a bit critical but trivial issues like you say might be the only thing these people see so its so so large for them and it might just be a word needed to save the home.

By: Omosolatola

Omosolatola — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 11:02:59 +0000

Well said aunty Tee…

@ Ade, please read the post all over again…

By: Tope

Tope — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 10:06:01 +0000

Ade,

Thanks for visiting and dropping a comment. Your comments are really interesting in that you repeated the same things i said, but in another way, you obviously didn’t read through the whole article well. I never mentioned anything about success and unhappiness in marriage, i wrote about the attitude surrounding success. Attitude is everything. There’s nothing wrong with a woman being more successful, but many (not all) can’t handle it in the home; i meet cases almost every day and it’s nothing but an improper attitude.

I agree that some men, have self esteem issues and i already advised them not to marry women that will keep them on the defensive. Stressing the fact that a man has issues doesn’t change anything.

If we all fix our attitudes, we can have fantastic relationships….

By: Ade

Ade — Mon, 15 Jun 2009 22:50:23 +0000

Hi,

This is nice but I don’t necessarily agree with all you have said. I believe it is a man who has self esteem issues that will worry about his woman being more successful. What do you mean by women are more successful? What are you talking about? I know many women who are very successful and happily married. So what? This is one of the unfounded lies that a lot of people have built their lives on. The man who is afraid of marrying the woman who is doing well is the man with issues. He has a low self esteem!

A man who is confident and secure in who he is in Christ won’t worry about such. And a godly successful woman will submit to her man. Be careful when you write things like this. You never know who might read it, you affect the minds of the young ones by making statements like this.

God bless.

By: oluyemi adeosun

oluyemi adeosun — Fri, 12 Jun 2009 10:12:34 +0000

“but marry someone who will not keep you permanently on the defensive”

This statement makes a lot of sense and meaning to me.

oro wa ooo

By: Niyioski

Niyioski — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 10:16:06 +0000

Please go for the idea of the marriage forum. Information is always power. I am sure it will be a relief for couples to hear about others who have gone through the same challenge they are facing in marriage and have overcome it. On a lighter mode, the above marriage vow looks like the born again version…lol, where is the for “better for worse” part that is always spoken about?…lol Nice post Tope. Thanks.